Here's my grandmother, Dora Barbaresi, with her husband, Freddie Donroe. It’s 1943 and the U.S. is two years into the war with Germany and Japan. Freddie was drafted by the U.S. Army. So was his best friend, Eddie Apuzzo, who had married Dora's sister, Dava.
Patriotic though he was, Freddie didn’t relish the idea of going to war. Before shipping off, Freddie asked Dora to go to church with him. There, he prayed: God, I’m going away, and I may die. But, if I do, let me die before I kill anybody. I don’t want to die with blood on my hands. Take me first.
While he was stationed in Brittany, France, Freddie sent several letters home, including a voice message to his family recorded on vinyl, which we still have. He fought in the Battle for Brest in 1944, and though it was a victory in the end for the Allies, Freddie was killed in the process. Dora became a widow at age 25 with their baby daughter. Sixty-three years later, Nonni still gets tears in her eyes when she talks about the love of her life: “I never stopped loving him.”
Dava’s husband, Eddie, also died.
No recipe this week.
Next Recipe: Meatballs
(Previous Recipe: Sweet Rice Pie)
This really resonates with me this week. Maybe it's because I'm thinking a lot about my own grandmother, who lost her husband and the love of her life for 70 years last August; maybe it's simply because loss, on any scale, seems simply unbearable; maybe it's because when loss is made personal then it truly is unbearable. Anyway, I love the photos, I hope you don't run out anytime soon.
Posted by: Catherine | May 12, 2007 at 02:32 AM
Catherine, well put. I have to admit shedding some tears while writing this one.
It's strange to think that I (and some of my relatives) wouldn't be around if it weren't for the heartbreak. And I can't help but feel for the families that are being changed by war as we speak.
Posted by: Tammy | May 12, 2007 at 07:56 AM
The one thing that strikes me about your family cookbook photographs is that everyone looks so happy. The pictures are full of energy. This makes your post so poignant.
Posted by: Cottage Smallhoder | May 12, 2007 at 05:56 PM
No recipe needed... instead you give us the ingredients in your life. My mother's day post was on the women in my life.
Somehow mother's day makes us wander on memory lane.
Posted by: sandi @ the whistlestop cafe | May 13, 2007 at 10:04 PM
Oh, no! I didn't think your nonni posts would be so sad. :( I don't know what to say.
I've been thinking about my grandmother a lot on Mother's Day as well. My grandfather left when she was pregnant with her sixth child. She raised them all, and took in three more. And I've been mulling all day on how to write something about her that would do her justice.
Posted by: Wandering Chopsticks | May 14, 2007 at 02:40 AM
W.C.: If there's ever a thought that counts, it's that.
Sandi: It's a lane worth traveling.
C.S.: Wish I could bottle that energy. It keeps Nonni young at 88.
Posted by: Tammy | May 14, 2007 at 09:43 PM